Sorry for the title, gonna share some past New Year's Memories and such.
First off Today, in the present, I have a house full of people I cannot believe I am tied to.
Its not like I do not cook the same meal as it was served to us years past.
But the menu for tonight is Black-eyed Peas. Greens (collard), Ham (Just a plain smoked ham, no fucking weird seasonings, just a salty good ham.) Cornbread, and a winter fruit cobbler.
No one once complained about the bountiful feast before, and if they want to sleep where it's warm, they will not now.
Not that I am forcing them to eat my cooking, but I am not a terrible cook. They want to break from tradition and order pizza.
I cannot lie and say I do not mind, or it does not bother me. I am just tired of pizza, so that is why I bought the stuff to make the meal, and its nearly done, with the cobbler in the oven being the last thing.
However Amy is already at the table, waiting patiently, as the magical smell of hot ham has lured her away from playing mannequin for my daughter.
All I am doing is setting the table, filling my own plate, and will eat with whoever decides pizza is trash compared to a fully home cooked meal.
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The first New Years I got to stay up with the adults or How I learned that frostbite on the ass is real.
This year was my 12th year.
GF/Friend/Wife was over at our house with her parents, as a lot of family friends with kids were over for the party, as my dad had a good chunk of his Christmas Bonus left.
The music was soft, and the youngest of kids were already tucked in, to sleep on the large bed in my siblings rooms, while I and GF were acting grown up, talking out of our asses, generally trying to fit in.
It did not work.
Understand I call her GF/Wife now, but this was months before I asked, but she was a little more than kind of sweet on me. Not major THINGS HAPPENED, before this. More like curiosities explored to a certain extent.
We were told to go find something to do before we were sent to bed.
We did.
I had finally perfected the route from my window to get on the roof.
It was colder than a witches tit in a beauty contest, and I gave her my heaviest coat. Chivalry comes at a price.
I donned my lighter jacket, and my sweat pants. I needed more on.
But sitting on the roof watching the starry night sky with her, and feeling the temperatures drop, and her right next to me, made me feel invincible, and not feel my ass going strangely numb.
I turned on the little radio, and we listened to music, and the ball drop.
We counted down, unknowingly counting down to my hospitalization.
We hugged when the year changed.
We made the harder than normal climb back into my room, where I must have sat down wrong in my desk chair, as our parents stumbled up the stairs to tell us good night.
No one goes home, as all keys were gathered and locked away.
I changed, and all she had to do was remove two layers of clothes and she was ready for bed.
The rule was the door could not be locked if she is sleeping in the room, and this time I let her take the bed. My folks passed my room for theirs, ad gave us a quick check, they closed the door to the room.
However the sneaky fun times were not as fun, as my ass was stinging pretty bad.
"Your ass is really deep red."
"Huh?"
"It looks like someone tried to beat it black and blue."
"Damn."
So we did some kissing, despite us not being official yet, the feelings were there and could not be ignored or denied.
It was when she touched my ass that I howled.
My mom despite being a little sloshed got out of bed, and made it to my room to see me lying on my side on the floor, as soon as I heard the alarm creak of the floor I flew to the floor and as the door opened, she looked at me, as I was actually crying as bad as if my mother whooped me silly.
"Writer, what the hell is wrong with you?"
My mom lost her soft motherly touch when woken up half past two in the morning.
"Momma, my butt hurts really bad."
"Did you try that weird stuff in that mag I burned?"
"No."
"Let me see."
So I showed my mother, and soon to be GF my bare ass.
"What did you do, and who did you do it to to get a whippin like that?"
"We sat on the roof to watch the stars of the new year."
"Damn it, how many layers did you wear outside?"
"Just my sweat pants and a light coat."
"Serves you right. Its single digits outside."
"WAHHH!"
"Grab those sweats, I will make the call."
Mom went to their bedroom, took dad's wallet, and since his company had family insurance as a perk, I was covered, so she handed me the card when she returned in her pj's and housecoat.
She called for an ambulance, as no one in the house was good or in some cases legal to drive.
"Girlie, go with him to the hospital and hold the big babies hand for me, until I can sober up, or get his dad sobered up. I will tell your folks."
"Yes ma'am!"
She got dressed all bundled and followed me to the sidewalk leading to the steps.
She rode with me as they tried their best not to hit every bump between my house and the hospital six miles away.
I was admitted to the ER, and handed the lady my insurance card when asked, and they sedated me a bit.
I woke up in a room, lying on my belly as my ass was up, and some nurses were doing things to it.
GF watched, and tried not to giggle or get mad that they were molesting my sore and pitiful ass.
Well, turns out I was lucky. It was not full on frostbite, but I was not out of the woods yet. Sitting on a frozen cold metal roof in single digit weather, in less than three layers of clothes was not smart.
"Son, do you not realize how lucky you are that it was just your butt."
"No, why?"
"Think of what else is down there, son."
It took me a minute.
"OH!"
"Yeah, and if it was your jewels, we would have to cut the affected skin off down there."
"So what are you doing to my butt?"
"Hot water, some medicinal lotion, and carefully removing the layer of dead skin. Once that is done, we will start helping it heal and after a couple of days, you will get to go home with some medicines and a special pillow."
"Oh."
"Rest well. Here is the remote. Happy New Year."
The doctor and nurses left the room with me alone with GF who was enjoying the leather recliner in my room, curling up like a little kitten. But the look in her eye told me she was in a THINGS HAPPENED mood. Despite I could not THINGS HAPPENED because I was stinging, and if I moved wrong it would go from sting to Jolt.
Apparently, my ass was cute, and she could see my Sting (not gonna call it Excalibur at this point, because its a bold faced lie.) since the gown was pulled away from my ass. I stayed like that for a little while, out of desire, and mostly out of fear of the Jolt of pain.
(Sting was a short sword in the Lord of the Rings.Actually found in The Hobbit.)
The nurses came in with some blankets, and some snacks, because GF was hungry. We ended up watching old sci fi movies as that was the limit of the t.v. in the hospital, old movies or news.
The nurse returned to get my vitals. Normally I would have been wheeled to the children's wing, but only terminally ill kids get a private room, and me lying half naked would not be appropriate for other kids.
Despite the pain meds making me feel new things, and the pain being dulled, I still felt a bit grown up.
We giggled at giant rubber monsters chased ladies around an island, when my grandmother showed up.
Fun.
I got an earful. A hug, and a two handed choco chip cookie. I split it with GF.
She left to return to New Years Bingo slam, an all night until noon the next day bingo marathon.
The next movie was about a man building a robot wife or something, had to keep the t.v. down because the door was left open.
I knew why. But that did not stop some kissin.
She likes to kiss me, even now in the future.
She crashed at five a.m. I followed soon after.
Breakfast time, and my mom was sitting in another chair brought in, GF was in the bathroom.
Having been filled in, mom sat and watched me. I stayed still, to not let her know I was awake.
"I know you are awake."
"Damn."
"Well you done messed up. But at least this isn't permanent."
"Yeah."
"I want you to do what ever they say."
"What if they want to touch me, or do weird butt stuff to me."
"Writer, do you want me to make your situation worse?"
She said as she was removing her slipper.
"No ma'am"
She was serious.
My mother attended the same sandal based martial arts school most mothers around the world did. She was a black belt in beating ass with her slippers.
She got up to leave, as she had to go home to cook New Years Dinner. She told GF that her parents gave the okay for her to stay with me.
GF saluted her respectfully.
So me and GF sat, while the nurses gave me some pain meds before sitting me up on my bare ass. It hurt a whole lot. But once I was up on my rear, the pain faded as the meds kicked in.
So GF and I ate our eggs and toast, the nurse having put in a food order for her. I drank my milk, and ate the fruit, and she stolen my bacon.
Once done, we flipped channels as I was out of it, so I handed the control to her, and rolled back on my stomach, and listened to whatever she found interesting.
But the peace would not last.
Vitals, medicine rub, then the first of the removal of the cold blistered skin.
If I was not stoned on the morphine shot, it would have killed me with pain.
I was wheeled back to the room on a smaller bed, ass covered, and gently moved to the bed.
Still out of it, but the dull ache was joined by a slight sting, the nurses cleaned the wounds and dressed them, with absorbing pads.
My IV was set up with low level antibiotics, and GF had the books she asked for, that my mom delivered, so she was engrossed in a Young Harlequin romance novel, my mom gifting them to her for Christmas.
My dad was enthused by this turn of events, as the entire collection my mom saved was taking up closet space.
GF was totally into the story, as I watched her face redden.
It was cute.
Only once did she have to ask a nurse what a word was, as it stumped me too.
So Lunch came later, I was coming down from my high, and we enjoyed cheeseburgers and fries, with sweet tea.
Then it was time for my bath.
Since I could not stand to shower, as I was weak legged from the drugs, and the pain making it hard to stand even to pee.
So the nurses washed me on the bed using those heated up all in one washing pads.
Oh did it feel so good. I felt like a king, as they wiped those pad things all over me that I popped a boner.
Oddly no one laughed. It got cleaned too, to the whispered objections from GF, not realizing this was normal, as they have to wash everything to lessen chances of infection.
Once they were done, my robe was changed along with my bedding, and once it was all done, it was nap time, because my ass was fully on fire with pain, as the meds fully wore off.
The nurse came in to give me my medicine, and change the bag for saline as I was showing some dehydration.
Blood was drawn, and then that nice little needle was sharing its love for me through my IV.
This time, I was out like a light.
Dinner came as I was waking up. It was a chicken dish, which was good. Had cranberry juice with it.
The stay there would carry on like this, until Dad, who was just getting off of work, came to the room, to play checkers with me.
The doctor came with nurses to check my ass, and the redness was almost gone, and the pain with it. So the doctor said I could leave the next day.
Mom came to pick me and GF up, after I showered, and was dressed, but still in my gown with a blanket wrapped around me.
We get home, where Me and GF sat in my room watching real t.v. as my mom wanted me to rest since I was still weak.
After dinner, GF after double checking if I was going to be okay, went home, only to show up the next day to help me out.
But the lesson I learned from this is: Sitting on super cold metal roofs is horrible for your ass.