Random Sexual Thoughts

[Shiela_M]

Definitely a Woo from me, that image made my knees want to leave each other

In 24 hours when I can give you another 

[Wildcat666]

I don’t get it 

Why are single guys running around like crazy men at parties, trying to pick up every woman, without a ring? They drink too much look stupid on the dancefloor and end up getting sent home in a taxi, alone. 

I would never do such a thing, but prefer to sit in a comfortable chair, near the chips, enjoying my drink.

Looking the women in the eyes, I make polite conversation, genuinely interested in their joys and troubles, while occasionally licking my eyebrows   

They do it because they might not be smart enough to fully understand "the thrill of the hunt." Quality over Quantity. I mean if you want to spend your life floating from one fling after another, go for it, but understand why many may view it as immature. I personally see using sex as some sort of competition is abuse. Because at the end of the day, when you feel shallow, vapid and bereft of any meaningful connections, because instead of building a relationship, you as a man hop from bed to bed, and that emptiness sets in, you and you alone are to blame. Not passing judgements, because men and women can enjoy an active sex life as they see fit, but its more of the views espoused by both sides that kind of puts it all into perspective. Besides, what prize is there for the number of women you can pick up? Unless i missed that memo, women do not want to be used like that for the most part. Not all, but some actually might want more than to be forgotten the next day after a cup of coffee. I digress, I am a man who married young, and doesn't regret it.

Please read the last line of my post again, especially the last three words   

[Writers Bloque]

I don’t get it 

Why are single guys running around like crazy men at parties, trying to pick up every woman, without a ring? They drink too much look stupid on the dancefloor and end up getting sent home in a taxi, alone. 

I would never do such a thing, but prefer to sit in a comfortable chair, near the chips, enjoying my drink.

Looking the women in the eyes, I make polite conversation, genuinely interested in their joys and troubles, while occasionally licking my eyebrows   

They do it because they might not be smart enough to fully understand "the thrill of the hunt." Quality over Quantity. I mean if you want to spend your life floating from one fling after another, go for it, but understand why many may view it as immature. I personally see using sex as some sort of competition is abuse. Because at the end of the day, when you feel shallow, vapid and bereft of any meaningful connections, because instead of building a relationship, you as a man hop from bed to bed, and that emptiness sets in, you and you alone are to blame. Not passing judgements, because men and women can enjoy an active sex life as they see fit, but its more of the views espoused by both sides that kind of puts it all into perspective. Besides, what prize is there for the number of women you can pick up? Unless i missed that memo, women do not want to be used like that for the most part. Not all, but some actually might want more than to be forgotten the next day after a cup of coffee. I digress, I am a man who married young, and doesn't regret it.

Please read the last line of my post again, especially the last three words   

I read it, but I am sorry, but I do not get it. But if it was a joke, I applaud you.

[Bell]

I don’t get it 

Why are the young, single guys running around like crazy men at parties, trying to pick up every woman, without a ring? They drink too much look stupid on the dancefloor and end up getting sent home in a taxi, alone. 

I would never do such a thing, but prefer to sit in a comfortable chair, near the chips, enjoying my drink.

Looking the women in the eyes, I make polite conversation, genuinely interested in their joys and troubles, while occasionally licking my eyebrows   

 

Can you teach me that DD? 

 

[Asmodel]

Today while brushing my teeth I had some water in the mouth meant for rinsing purposes.
Mid-brushing the battery of my electric brush seemingly died off, so I started using it as one would use a normal brush. (That is, in the in-and-out motion)
Again, mid-brushing (in the old fashioned way) the battery came alive.
And, consequently, water started leaking or more like squirting from my mouth, in a really familiar fashion.

 

[Wildcat666]

And, consequently, water started leaking or more like squirting from my mouth, in a really familiar fashion.

 

[Wildcat666]

Can you teach me that DD? 

 

Nope. I dare not.             

 

[Pornhubby]

My girlfriend sent me a selfie today. And in the background was her rather curvaceous mother, in a black bra and panties. So now I’ve got this whole “want to fuck mommy” thing in my head. What I really want to know is, was it an accident? Or an invitation?

[Wildcat666]

You could compliment your girlfreind for the selfie, and then add something like "Give my regards to your mother. She looks great too."
You might get a reaction. 

[Asmodel]

I don’t get it 

Why are single guys running around like crazy men at parties, trying to pick up every woman, without a ring? They drink too much look stupid on the dancefloor and end up getting sent home in a taxi, alone. 

I would never do such a thing, but prefer to sit in a comfortable chair, near the chips, enjoying my drink.

Looking the women in the eyes, I make polite conversation, genuinely interested in their joys and troubles, while occasionally licking my eyebrows   

They do it because they might not be smart enough to fully understand "the thrill of the hunt." Quality over Quantity. I mean if you want to spend your life floating from one fling after another, go for it, but understand why many may view it as immature. I personally see using sex as some sort of competition is abuse. Because at the end of the day, when you feel shallow, vapid and bereft of any meaningful connections, because instead of building a relationship, you as a man hop from bed to bed, and that emptiness sets in, you and you alone are to blame. Not passing judgements, because men and women can enjoy an active sex life as they see fit, but its more of the views espoused by both sides that kind of puts it all into perspective. Besides, what prize is there for the number of women you can pick up? Unless i missed that memo, women do not want to be used like that for the most part. Not all, but some actually might want more than to be forgotten the next day after a cup of coffee. I digress, I am a man who married young, and doesn't regret it.

Please read the last line of my post again, especially the last three words   

I read it, but I am sorry, but I do not get it. But if it was a joke, I applaud you.

yeah, I don’t get it either.   

[Writers Bloque]

Random Sex Thought Joke:

 One day a man named Billy was cursed for lying. After a couple of days the being cursing him decided to curse the wayward man with Pinnocchio's curse. Considering it impractical that his nose would grow, as it would be an insult to those with odd noses, she decided to hit him where it counts. So Billy was asked at work if he moved the crates as ordered so the new shipments could be unloaded. He did not, and being a stern but fair boss decided to ask him directly. He lied and as the bosses personal secretary was bending over at the filing cabinets, Billy was promptly fired.

However, it would not go down. So riding home on his bike, he cut someone off and caused an accident, and the female officer after dropping her pen, arrested poor Billy for assault. After his jail sentence was up, he wandered the streets, and came upon a blind woman, and her daughters running a food truck. He grabbed a hot dog and did not pay, so when asked if he stole the food, he made their day. Now Billy was sad and alone, the night air cold as stone. He looked up at the moon, and said "Everything is good."

NASA watched with horror as Billy rocketed skyward at a thousand miles an hour, as forgetting to make it stop, the being who cursed him tried to fix it, but still he did not drop. Up and up Billy did go, his cock not growing, but shrinking as fast as it grew. With little food and air, Billy sat on the moon, where firmly planted his cock was through, growing longer and longer with each lie told. The moon being a gentle mistress asked him if that was his penis in her crack, and with his final lie, he was rocketed back. Now in the tiny village square sits a statue to the poor man, who with a lie knocked up the moon, and when they found his corpse, it was rife with a wicked case of space crabs, and child support strife.

Now a thought to ponder, how many lies would it take to get to the moon, I ponder?

[Dudester]

So, this morning I read a story about people embarrassed because their nudes had been leaked-a memory popped into my mind.
I had gone to work at a new company. The first day that I walked in the cute security guard looked familiar.
"Do I know you?" I asked.
"I don't know, do you?" she asked, then she turned to the male security guard next to her and asked "Was there anything shameful in what I used to do?" she asked him.
He shook his head. "Nope."
I went to my office, then I remembered, she was a stripper that I had banged a year earlier. After a few days she was transferred to another building.
About a week later I came downstairs, ready to leave when I saw a MASSIVE security guard sitting at the desk. Exchanging pleasantries I noticed that he was a supervisor. He noticed that I noticed that. "We're having staffing issues" he said. I nodded and left. Over the next couple of weeks I saw the same supervisor, not working the desk, but he was on rounds. One day, out of mutual boredom we struck up a conversation. It turned out that he was married to the cute security guard and they were having relationship issues.
The next time I saw him he was quite angry as he discovered that she was cheating on him. "Can I show you something?" he asked. From his backpack he pulled a VHS tape. "Come on" he said and led me to the break room (our break rooms had a combination TV/VCR). He popped in the tape. It was her nude, using a dildo on herself. Isn't she hot?" he asked.
I didn't want to tell him that not only had I seen her nude, I had banged her, albeit with a condom.
"Yeah, I'm going to divorce her." he said.

I didn't see either of them again and about a week after the incident I was told that a security supervisor and his wife had gotten into a big fight at work and both were fired.

[Shiela_M]

Jealous of Jules' trip, and I'm tired of the cold, wet, and miserable clouds. I just want to be laying in the hot sun, preferably on the warm sand next to some refreshing water, feeling my body absorb all those harmful UV rays, and caress and rub myself into ecstacy.

[JBRG]

Jealous of Jules' trip, and I'm tired of the cold, wet, and miserable clouds. I just want to be laying in the hot sun, preferably on the warm sand next to some refreshing water, feeling my body absorb all those harmful UV rays, and caress and rub myself into ecstacy.

There's room on my roof to join me in absorbing all of those harmful UV rays. And if you want to caress and rub yourself into ecstasy, I promise I won't interrupt.

[Pornhubby]

My random thought is: It is Friday, my balls are full, and I really just want a volunteer to slap my dick around for a half an hour and milk all this jizz out. That is all.

[Writers Bloque]

Why do we equate sex with food? Nothing is better than sex, if the item only lasts to the last crumb, can it be said that it is better than sex if eating it takes less time than a good old fashioned night of fucking? I hear people say "this is better than sex." and I am like nope. because sex can last. Or are they just having bad sex?

[Dudester]

Why do we equate sex with food? Nothing is better than sex, if the item only lasts to the last crumb, can it be said that it is better than sex if eating it takes less time than a good old fashioned night of fucking? I hear people say "this is better than sex." and I am like nope. because sex can last. Or are they just having bad sex?

I have never been married. Married people, with kids, seem to have found a way to only enjoy a 10 or 15 minute quickie. For me, anything under two hours is a quickie. Not only that, but in my early 20's I was schooled by a Phillipino mama san on how to make love. Using those techniques, high dollar hookers have given me serious discounts because they appreciate that I take the time for them to ring that bell three times before I even mount up to ride.

[Shiela_M]

For me, anything under two hours is a quickie.

Love a good quickie from time to time. Quick, intense, and over. Personally for me a quickie isnt about the orgasm, or at least mine, it's all about him. Send him off with a big smile and me with a warmth inside. The idea that he needed it before he got in about his day, couldnt wait till later when we had more time. Love it.

I've had days where I'll spend the whole day naked or close to it, and it'll be on again off again sex. Or we'll play around with each other for a while. Those occasions, then yes several hours is good, but when I turn that switch on and it's just foreplay and sex, half hour is more than plenty of time. You make things last more than 45-60 minutes, and I'm just going to go for it and focus every oounce f my energy to get you to cum.

If I were a prostitute and you make things go for 2 hours, I'm not giving you a discount, I'm charging you for overtime. 

[staci]

And then we have the "nooner"

Usually lunchtime and a rush to the finish line. Generally leads to sitting in a puddle for the rest of the work day and liberal use of spray deoderant.

[Shiela_M]

And then we have the "nooner"

Usually lunchtime and a rush to the finish line. Generally leads to sitting in a puddle for the rest of the work day and liberal use of spray deoderant.

Sometimes done in the parking lot somewhere. Think I've said it before, but I find it quite enjoyable walking around talking with people knowing that he just let loose inside me. Makes me feel so dirty yet unbelievably sexy.