KRISTEN'S BOARD
KB - a better class of pervert

News:

Random Sexual Thoughts

Guest · 49370

0 Members and 5 Guests are viewing this topic.

Offline watcher1

  • POY 2010
  • Burnt at the stake
  • *******
    • Posts: 16,989
    • Woos/Boos: +1719/-56
    • Gender: Male
  • Gentleman Pervert
Reply #200 on: January 28, 2021, 09:57:30 PM
Sick of doing chores and because of a conversation I had with a few of you in PMs, the first thought I had was, "wish i had somebodies face to sit on."

Watcher raises his good wing. I volunteer.  :emot_kiss:

Emancipate yourself from mental slavery, none but ourselves can free our minds.


Offline Army of One

  • Freakishly Strange
  • ******
    • Posts: 1,329
    • Woos/Boos: +192/-2
    • Gender: Male
Reply #201 on: January 29, 2021, 03:20:21 AM
Sick of doing chores and because of a conversation I had with a few of you in PMs, the first thought I had was, "wish i had somebodies face to sit on."
I'll volunteer!

Extinguishing the Flame is available on Amazon and supports Australian Bush fire relief.


Offline Sweetums

  • Total freak
  • *****
    • Posts: 762
    • Woos/Boos: +97/-1
    • Gender: Male
  • Disclaimer: I am an idiot. Don't listen to me.
Reply #202 on: January 30, 2021, 01:11:28 AM
Sick of doing chores and because of a conversation I had with a few of you in PMs, the first thought I had was, "wish i had somebodies face to sit on."

I'm imagining a special Moderator's Chair for MJ. A number of selfless volunteer KBers are strapped lying down into a turntable behind /underneath the throne. The throne rotates like a revolver every time a lever is pulled. As she continues to moderate and orgasm and the current tongue becomes tired, she pulls a lever, and the next KBer rotates into place. Or perhaps, after each orgasm is complete, she pulls the lever to give the next KBer a chance to give her one. That would mix it up a bit more while offering a sense of completion and a job well done for our selfless heroes. Fun for everyone! Perhaps also standing at the middle of the turntable is a fluffer for the guys? It would be good to have a bit of diversion while awaiting your turn or inspiration when you're under the hot seat.
« Last Edit: January 30, 2021, 01:18:56 AM by Sweetums »



Offline Sweetums

  • Total freak
  • *****
    • Posts: 762
    • Woos/Boos: +97/-1
    • Gender: Male
  • Disclaimer: I am an idiot. Don't listen to me.
Reply #203 on: January 30, 2021, 02:35:54 AM
Since Mrs Sweetums #3 has lost her libido, is unresponsive in bed, and is sullen about it and won't look into doing anything about it even though we have the resources to do so, I've begun to consider my options.

My therapist suggested that I might be able to create a stable polyamorous relationship. I can see how that might work in terms of everybody getting their needs met. However a) I have no idea where to find people who would be interested in such an arrangement and b) I'm concerned that we wouldn't be what most polyamorous individuals or couples would be looking for. If I as an individual was on the hunt for a polyamorous relationship, I would only consider couples with strong successful relationships, and I would never represent my current situation as that.

Anybody with experience have any thoughts or ideas for me in this matter?


Offline Bittersweet

  • Degenerate
  • ***
    • Posts: 143
    • Woos/Boos: +102/-1
    • Gender: Male
Reply #204 on: January 30, 2021, 06:25:51 AM
Sick of doing chores and because of a conversation I had with a few of you in PMs, the first thought I had was, "wish i had somebodies face to sit on."


Alternate chores and facesitting..



Offline Clitical Thinking

  • Freakishly Strange
  • ******
    • Posts: 2,141
    • Woos/Boos: +432/-17
    • Gender: Male
Reply #205 on: January 30, 2021, 07:31:40 AM
Huh, this thread is suddenly causing my face and tongue to get tingly  ;D



Offline Shiela_M

  • POY 2020, 2021, & 2022
  • Burnt at the stake
  • *******
    • Posts: 6,164
    • Woos/Boos: +3287/-6
    • Gender: Female
  • I said it's weird, not that I wouldn't do it.
Reply #206 on: February 04, 2021, 04:01:43 PM
Wondering if I should call BIG Ben and see if he wants to shelter together during the snowfall.  If the weather outside is going to be terrible I would rather spend it sweaty on all fours getting f@#$ed hard. Might as well make today a great one, tomorrow might suck and life's too short for two crappy days in a row.

(Last second thought) If the weather is going to suck, so should I
« Last Edit: February 04, 2021, 04:59:41 PM by Shiela_M »



Offline msslave

  • Co-POY 2019
  • Burnt at the stake
  • *******
    • Posts: 8,825
    • Woos/Boos: +1376/-3
    • Gender: Male
Reply #207 on: February 04, 2021, 04:54:22 PM
Our Shiela...what a way with words she  has. :emot_laughing:

Well trained and been made compliant....by my cat Neville


Offline Shiela_M

  • POY 2020, 2021, & 2022
  • Burnt at the stake
  • *******
    • Posts: 6,164
    • Woos/Boos: +3287/-6
    • Gender: Female
  • I said it's weird, not that I wouldn't do it.
Reply #208 on: February 04, 2021, 05:02:40 PM
Our Shiela...what a way with words she  has. :emot_laughing:

 :emot_laughing:

Well I'm feeling a bit randy today and was wondering how I could put it to make it sound sexy or sensual, but that isn't what my head was telling me.

My literal spoken words to myself were, "I should call him. Spend the cold getting f@#$ing plowed"



Offline Shiela_M

  • POY 2020, 2021, & 2022
  • Burnt at the stake
  • *******
    • Posts: 6,164
    • Woos/Boos: +3287/-6
    • Gender: Female
  • I said it's weird, not that I wouldn't do it.
Reply #209 on: February 23, 2021, 05:02:29 AM
I just want somebody to snuggle up under a blanket with.

Then I realize, I'm absolutely horrible at cuddling. You hold me the right way, and within 10 minutes, your dick will be in my hands... 15 minutes, my mouth... after that, dealers choice.



_priapism

  • Guest
Reply #210 on: February 23, 2021, 05:06:23 AM
Our Shiela...what a way with words she  has. :emot_laughing:

 :emot_laughing:

Well I'm feeling a bit randy today and was wondering how I could put it to make it sound sexy or sensual, but that isn't what my head was telling me.

My literal spoken words to myself were, "I should call him. Spend the cold getting f@#$ing plowed"


You've passed me in woo's now, but how the fuck am I supposed to compete with that?   :emot_laughing:



Offline Shiela_M

  • POY 2020, 2021, & 2022
  • Burnt at the stake
  • *******
    • Posts: 6,164
    • Woos/Boos: +3287/-6
    • Gender: Female
  • I said it's weird, not that I wouldn't do it.
Reply #211 on: February 23, 2021, 05:46:32 AM
Our Shiela...what a way with words she  has. :emot_laughing:

 :emot_laughing:

Well I'm feeling a bit randy today and was wondering how I could put it to make it sound sexy or sensual, but that isn't what my head was telling me.

My literal spoken words to myself were, "I should call him. Spend the cold getting f@#$ing plowed"


You've passed me in woo's now, but how the fuck am I supposed to compete with that?   :emot_laughing:

You could always become the plow. BIG Ben and I are taking a break.



Offline Shiela_M

  • POY 2020, 2021, & 2022
  • Burnt at the stake
  • *******
    • Posts: 6,164
    • Woos/Boos: +3287/-6
    • Gender: Female
  • I said it's weird, not that I wouldn't do it.
Reply #212 on: March 02, 2021, 08:36:10 PM
Salted caramel.

Chatting with a friend and I think I made the perfect comparison. Was talking about sex and how I like to get slapped sometimes.  She finds it odd considering my past abuse.  So... salted caramel.

An abusive slap is like a teaspoon of salt shoved in your mouth.

A sexy slap is a pinch of salt, just enough to bite your tongue.  Take that pinch and add it to caramel and you've got something amazing. Salty sweet, Pain and pleasure.



Online purpleshoes

  • Freakishly Strange
  • ******
    • Posts: 1,109
    • Woos/Boos: +473/-3
Reply #213 on: March 03, 2021, 01:05:08 PM
Salted caramel.

Chatting with a friend and I think I made the perfect comparison. Was talking about sex and how I like to get slapped sometimes.  She finds it odd considering my past abuse.  So... salted caramel.

An abusive slap is like a teaspoon of salt shoved in your mouth.

A sexy slap is a pinch of salt, just enough to bite your tongue.  Take that pinch and add it to caramel and you've got something amazing. Salty sweet, Pain and pleasure.

You are a very strange gal Ms. Shiela. And that's only part of what makes you so freakin' adorable.  :-*



Offline Dirtymind

  • Total freak
  • *****
    • Posts: 905
    • Woos/Boos: +137/-1
    • Gender: Male
Reply #214 on: March 03, 2021, 01:28:49 PM
Salted caramel.

Chatting with a friend and I think I made the perfect comparison. Was talking about sex and how I like to get slapped sometimes.  She finds it odd considering my past abuse.  So... salted caramel.

An abusive slap is like a teaspoon of salt shoved in your mouth.

A sexy slap is a pinch of salt, just enough to bite your tongue.  Take that pinch and add it to caramel and you've got something amazing. Salty sweet, Pain and pleasure.

Abuse will give you a different view on sex. As will trust. If you trust someone enough to indulge your deepest fantasies, that's brilliant - but it's also very hard.




_priapism

  • Guest
Reply #215 on: March 04, 2021, 03:55:05 AM
A girlfriend slipped on the ice today and landed on her coccyx. What is it with my girls landing on their coccyx this week?  Sex on a donut pillow (gentle careful sex) is no fun!



Offline Shiela_M

  • POY 2020, 2021, & 2022
  • Burnt at the stake
  • *******
    • Posts: 6,164
    • Woos/Boos: +3287/-6
    • Gender: Female
  • I said it's weird, not that I wouldn't do it.
Reply #216 on: March 04, 2021, 04:21:49 AM
A girlfriend slipped on the ice today and landed on her coccyx. What is it with my girls landing on their coccyx this week?  Sex on a donut pillow (gentle careful sex) is no fun!

It's not like we can stop and think about it.  I think our subconscious reaction is to land on our butts.  Stupid little tail bone reminds us that's not always a good idea. Mines all better now though.  All the tenderness is gone, but I haven't gotten laid in a month so it's not like it matters much.



_priapism

  • Guest
Reply #217 on: March 04, 2021, 04:55:25 AM
A girlfriend slipped on the ice today and landed on her coccyx. What is it with my girls landing on their coccyx this week?  Sex on a donut pillow (gentle careful sex) is no fun!

It's not like we can stop and think about it.  I think our subconscious reaction is to land on our butts.  Stupid little tail bone reminds us that's not always a good idea. Mines all better now though.  All the tenderness is gone, but I haven't gotten laid in a month so it's not like it matters much.


Sasha fell on hers today.  She’s in agony.



Offline Shiela_M

  • POY 2020, 2021, & 2022
  • Burnt at the stake
  • *******
    • Posts: 6,164
    • Woos/Boos: +3287/-6
    • Gender: Female
  • I said it's weird, not that I wouldn't do it.
Reply #218 on: March 06, 2021, 06:07:57 PM
If I was an uber driver wore no mask, and had a terrible cough, but was topless, would you still get in?



_priapism

  • Guest
Reply #219 on: March 06, 2021, 07:09:29 PM
If I was an uber driver wore no mask, and had a terrible cough, but was topless, would you still get in?


  :emot_thdrool: :emot_thdrool: :emot_thdrool:

If I was an Uber rider without a mask, stroking a huge piece of man meat in the back seat, would you keep driving, or pull off at the next rest stop to personally inspect?