What RUINED your day today?

[_priapism]

That awkward moment when the TSA agent looks at your passport, looks at you, looks at your passport, looks at you, and finally says, “I don’t think this is your photograph.”
 
“I used to be a much better looking man.”

[Jed_]

That awkward moment when the TSA agent looks at your passport, looks at you, looks at your passport, looks at you, and finally says, “I don’t think this is your photograph.”
 
“I used to be a much better looking man.”

Marriages will do that to you.  I’m only on #2, so my looks have only eroded a little.   

[_priapism]

That awkward moment when the TSA agent looks at your passport, looks at you, looks at your passport, looks at you, and finally says, “I don’t think this is your photograph.”
 
“I used to be a much better looking man.”

Marriages will do that to you.  I’m only on #2, so my looks have only eroded a little.   

And open heart surgery... I have mostly grey hair now, a big bushy mustache, and was wearing glasses.  So yes, I looked a lot younger 8 years ago.

[msslave]

Well I was set for a great weekend. My 55 year High School reunion and seeing all the other old farts I went to school with. Left at 6:30 am on a 4 hour plus trip.

Only got a few blocks and I had to admit to wife I was seeing double. Not a condition you want to drive with. It's happened to me before. Optic Nerve Palsy...causes one eye to go askew, causing the double images.  Went home and surprised the cats. They know what it means when I carry out the suitcase.

[Jed_]

That awkward moment when the TSA agent looks at your passport, looks at you, looks at your passport, looks at you, and finally says, “I don’t think this is your photograph.”
 
“I used to be a much better looking man.”

Marriages will do that to you.  I’m only on #2, so my looks have only eroded a little.   

And open heart surgery... I have mostly grey hair now, a big bushy mustache, and was wearing glasses.  So yes, I looked a lot younger 8 years ago.

At least you have hair.  And my Peruvian banished facial hair.  Bald on top with all grey hair on the sides is not a great look for me, so I close crop it.

My eyes aren’t too bad, just need reading glasses for fine print.

Reminds me, I need to reapply for a passport to go to Peru next year to meet her dad.  My last passport expired in 2009.  Since it was from 1999, I probably looked young in it.  And it had a Peru stamp.

[ChirpingGirl]

Both my sister and her wifey got mail from New York.

CJ knows what it is. And I actually hope it's BAD news, but I don't think it is. I  know it's amazing news for them, horrible for the family.  

[Remington555]

Well that certainly sounds intriguing. I stopped counting after 17 questions came to mind.

Ah well, you know that old saying. If someone closes a door, try to find a window. Or something like that. 

Remmy

[ChirpingGirl]

CJ's gonna give her little sister an earful when she gets home.

She flat out lied to us about her and her wifeys career plans. She promised they'd try to be local. I've been to New York twice. It's great, but looking back, it's not a place I'd want to live. And I don't want their daughter growing up there. But obviously I have no say at all in what they do. 

WHAT WERE THEY THINKING!?? 


CJ mad. 

[_priapism]

Chicago Tribune columnist Mary Schmich (and later Baz Lurhman) said:

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard.
Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.

You can only make choices for yourself, and you can only control how you react to the choices made by others.  Breath deep.  Love.  It will all work out exactly as it is supposed to.

[ChirpingGirl]

Chicago Tribune columnist Mary Schmich (and later Baz Lurhman) said:

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard.
Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.

You can only make choices for yourself, and you can only control how you react to the choices made by others.  Breath deep.  Love.  It will all work out exactly as it is supposed to.

I'd prevent them from ever going to California.   

[Jed_]

My Peruvian told me yesterday she was driving on the Interstate at 85 mph.  I asked why was she driving unsafely way over the speed limit.  She replied, ‘I was running out of gas, and wanted to make it home.’

I explained that she was probably burning the gas faster that way then asked why she didn’t just stop for gas.  It seems she didn’t know about the lever under the dash to open it.

You know those newfangled gas cans with the no spill spigots?  Well, I spilled gas all over the fucking place using the new can I bought and ready to toss it in the trash.  Except, you can’t find the normal ones any more (that I never had problems with spills before).  These new ones spill gas no matter what I do?

Meanwhile, I need more gas for my lawn tractor.  Gotta replace the bent blade on it first.  I tried once doing that, hours of cussing later I took it to someone who did it for $25.  Won’t be doing that myself ever again.

[MintJulie]

My Peruvian told me yesterday she was driving on the Interstate at 85 mph.  I asked why was she driving unsafely way over the speed limit.  She replied, ‘I was running out of gas, and wanted to make it home.’

I explained that she was probably burning the gas faster that way then asked why she didn’t just stop for gas.  It seems she didn’t know about the lever under the dash to open it.

You know those newfangled gas cans with the no spill spigots?  Well, I spilled gas all over the fucking place using the new can I bought and ready to toss it in the trash.  Except, you can’t find the normal ones any more (that I never had problems with spills before).  These new ones spill gas no matter what I do?

Meanwhile, I need more gas for my lawn tractor.  Gotta replace the bent blade on it first.  I tried once doing that, hours of cussing later I took it to someone who did it for $25.  Won’t be doing that myself ever again.

Amazon for the gas can.

When Dan moved in with me, he brought this.  https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07LD3V5PJ/ref=sspa_dk_detail_4?psc=1
Sounds like an old style that you might be looking for.

I have a 2.5 gallon no spill and love it.

[Jed_]

Thanks Jules, got 3 of the sucky ones to replace.

[_priapism]

Thanks Jules, got 3 of the sucky ones to replace.

I fucking HATE those plastic cans, and have also spilt gas all over the place trying to use one.

So I bought new spouts for my plastic cans.

https://ezpourspout.com/

[ChirpingGirl]

Other than my sisters LIE, it's oppressively humid. Couldn't bring myself to take the 5 year old and wifey #2 to the park today. Too much to do anyway, gotta prepare for the tribes return tomorrow. Gotta make sure the mansion is clean, food stocked for empty little tummies and not a particle of dust or grime anywhere. Don't want anyone to think I was being lazy for 2 weeks. 

[watcher1]

I fucking HATE those plastic cans, and have also spilt gas all over the place trying to use one.

So I bought new spouts for my plastic cans.

I just use a large funnel. No spout, no mess.

[ChirpingGirl]

My sister and her wifey confirmed their good news. 

[ChirpingGirl]

Had a small fight with my sister last night about her lie. 

But her wifey broke it up and told us we were being "bloody idiots" 

That British accent is just too cute to not pay attention to. 

[Jed_]

Thanks Jules, got 3 of the sucky ones to replace.

I fucking HATE those plastic cans, and have also spilt gas all over the place trying to use one.

So I bought new spouts for my plastic cans.

https://ezpourspout.com/

I knew it couldn’t just be me.  Fucking things are a fire hazard.

Thanks toe, gonna try and order just the spouts today.

[psiberzerker]

I like the milsurp Jerry cans, and a funnel.  Honestly, the tube spout is just a bad design.  (IMNSHO)  You have to perform Selective Compliance on a vertical hole, with gallons of fossil fuels sloshing around on the other end of the nozzle.  No lock coupling, just a human being, who's used to doing this at the gas station with teens of feet of spring loaded hose, the pump bolted to the ground behind them, and a re-fueling bay with a meter on the front of it.

Then again, I was taught Hydraulic Fluid Power Systems by the Army.  That hydraulic fluid?  Yeah, 5 gallon jugs, or 40 gallon oil drums with hand pumps.  Just to top off the hydraulic fluid in the reservoir.  

And a gooseneck funnel.  Quite possibly a Driver's Ed graduate civilian that can't change a tyre, because they can't figure out the Jack/Points.  I just kinda have to troubleshoot the potential points of failure, and remember all the people I've seen going down the highway with their gas cap hanging from the lanyard.  I've seen one with the fuel door closed, and the fill-cap hanging from the bottom edge of the access panel.

You can't make anything fool-proof, they'll just come out with a more advanced fool.