Heard from a long time member on my site whose wife has been battling cancer for years, she has just gone to hospice and given about two weeks. I lost my wife last year, so I got some idea on how it hurts. At least my loss was sudden, and not lingering while I watched helplessly.
I heard from him today, and he’s a widower now like me. I don’t even know what to say to him.
It’s been 8 months since my wife passed, and I still get the nightmares with one as recently as last week. You’d think my nightmares would be about finding her like I did face down in the kitchen with her head cracked open, but no they come in two types:
Type one is she’s dying and I keep saving her just to have her dying again for different reasons over and over until I wake up and yell ‘Fuck!’
Type two nightmares are she really isn’t dead, and woke some place like the coroners. I just didn’t know for some period of time. I had this type last week, where I was in trouble at work because they thought I faked her death to get paid leave. It was so damned real, when I woke I looked at the picture of her tombstone on my phone as a sanity check. I still yell ‘Fuck’ with these nightmares, it’s just delayed.
Anyway, I know he has a long road of dealing with it ahead of him.