The weirdest thing I can remember was, I think, a waterlogged coconut I encountered while snorkeling in Hawaii. I had gone there with my girlfriend and her parents. I found this object floating along and it had a hole in one end, so I stuck my cock in it and pumped it until I came. I was under water humping whatever it was, using my snorkel to breathe and while I was "fukin' the nut, a couple came snorkeling along, saw me and headed the other way. Too bad they didn't want to get involved. Anyway, my girlfriend and her parents were pissed when I got back to shore. They wanted to know what took me so long. I told them I had just gotten caught up watching some cool fish. I still fucked the daylights outta my girlfriend that night, hell, I'd fucked her the night before, too.