I spent a happy 15 minutes leading two telephone scammers up a dead end.
Her: Amazon here, we have discovered a fraudulent purchase of a gift card on your Amazon account and would like to help you recover the charge.
Me: I'm sorry this is a bad line could you repeat that
Her: repeats the above
Me: Sorry, I don't really understand what has gone on
Her (getting a bit irritated): repeats the above
Me: Oh, now I understand, that really is very helpful of you. Of course I would like to claim a refund
Her: Let me pass you over to my supervisor
Him: repeats fictitious details of transaction and even gives a plausible address in London where the fraud was supposed to have taken place.
Me: How do I reclaim the money
Him: What device are you using
Me (without being anywhere near a computer): A PC
Him: Can you open google
Me (ditto): Yes
Him: Now type in show my ip
Me: Ok, done that
Him: what does it say on the screen?
Me: A rather strange message has appeared on the screen
Him: What does it say.
Me: Are you sure you want me to read it to you?
Him: Yes
Me: Are you really sure?
Him (getting slightly annoyed): Yes, I am sure
Me: Are you really, really sure.
Him (now very annoyed): Yes, read it to me.
Me: It says - tell that stupid cunt on the other end of the phone to fuck off to the far side of fuck knows where
Me: Hello, hello, please don't hang up ..........