Violated after break in

[Lippy]

Last night my house was broken into, thankfully I wasn't there. My insurance should cover the items that were stolen financially.  However I am left in fear, and feel violated that someone has invaded my personal space and has been though my belongings. I know it is early days, but I don't feel like I can live there anymore and I am planning on clearing everything up and putting it on the market.

I have an irrational fear of burglars after suffering from a traumatic experience as a child. I don't live in a bad neighbourhood so I didn't really expect it.

I'm just wondering if anyone has experienced similar and how you dealt with it?

[Lippy]

I have decided to stay with family for now. The police have started their investigations, but I'm not hopeful. I just can't face going back there. I am lucky enough that I can find a new place until I sell it, but like you said,  I will no doubt take the terror with me. I did have an alarm but due to work being carried out on my property it wasn't activated, and it has left me suspicious of everyone that had entered my home.

Thank you for your kind words

[Grm]

Sorry to hear about your break in. It happened to me a few years ago, I am lucky, I'm one of those people who can move on and departmentalise. It felt pretty horrible as you say, but it happened and after clearing up and making my claims, I put it behind me. I understand my response might not help you though. If you live alone this might make you feel more vulnerable, but however you cope with this nasty incident in your life don't let it begin to take over.

[Lippy]

The theft of my possessions isn't getting to me yet, I don't think anything of any personal value has been taken.  However the notion that someone has touched my belongings is getting to me. I believe your home is an extension of yourself,  it's your sanctuary. I now feel that my safe place is no longer that. I do live alone and it has rarely bothered me. I think me previous phobia has made it 10times worse.

[DemonDelight]

I know it's not exactly the same, but when I was pregnant with my first, my daughter, our car got broken into on the passenger side (smashed the window) and the took my husband's iPod. On that iPod he had downloaded a few videos of my ultrasound where we could see her kicking and squirming. That broke my heart knowing that someone would see it and erase it like it meant nothing just so they could have a fucking iPod. And the fact that the busted the passenger window made it feel personal to me because at that point in time I wasn't driving, I was always the passenger.

Not too long after that, our next-door neighbors appt was broken into and I was in constant fear they would return and come into our place. I made my husband get me a dog. That dog honestly wouldn't have done a thing to protect us, he was a sweet, but stupid one lol, but he would bark if anyone came through the door.

Now I live somewhere else, a relatively good neighborhood, but I had the community maintenance install chain locks on the front and back doors. I still worry about burglars, but I have a better feeling of security. I do think the change of scenery helped, but I'm not saying that's what you need to do. You should do what you feel most comfortable with.

I'm so sorry you had to go through this. A violation of one's privacy is never easy to overcome. I hope you are able to find peace soon. You have my private email, feel free to contact me if ever you feel the need/want.  

[MissBarbara]

About 5 or 6 years ago my apartment was broken into. Fortunately, they didn't get much of value -- mainly because I don't own much of value. They took a DVD player and all-in-one stereo system, a bunch of CDs (wtf?), and some worthless costume jewelery.

Like Grm, I'm someone who can compartmentalize and move on -- but I couldn't in this instance. It was a sense of personal violation that really threw me for a loop. The monetary loss was negligible, but the fact that some stranger was in my home and going through my things really scared me.

Fortunately, a friend came over and when the police left, I went to her apartment and stayed for several days. A few days later, a Saturday, she went back with me to the apartment, and we cleaned the entire place from top to bottom and I washed just about every item of clothing I owned. That, plus the fact that she spent that and the following night there with me, helped me readjust and make it my home again.

That fact that you're talking about this is wonderful, Lippy. Rely on friends and family for the time being, and go back when you're read to go back.





 

[Well Behaved Lady]

My situation is different, I had my handbag taken from me. I wasn't hurt when it happened and my bag was found within yards of where it was taken in a laneway, however the feeling of being violated is very much familiar to me and exactly how I felt at the time. The fact I had very few personal items on me as it was a night out was a Godsend, but it didn't matter the bastard took something from me. I felt vulnerable for a longtime after. I felt he had taken something from me, not just my bag.

You are in a state of shock right now, your personal space has been intruded upon without your approval. I hope it passes and you get the closure I did eventually.

XXX

[Cats Whiskers]

I've never lived anywhere that's been broken into - and touch wood, it'll stay that way, but I can sympathise with you Lippy and all of the other members who have suffered at the hands of the dregs of society.

I can only hope Lippy, that you manage to put this behind you and find a place where you can find safety and security for the future.

Good luck and stay safe no matter where you find yourself.

[Lippy]

I'm sorry to hear that you have experienced the same missb. I really couldn't give a shit about what was stolen.

I can't imagine living there again. I'm questioning whether running is the right response, but I can't see another option. I have even contemplated getting a guard dog...Janus?

[Janus]

I'm sorry to hear that you have experienced the same missb. I really couldn't give a shit about what was stolen.

I can't imagine living there again. I'm questioning whether running is the right response, but I can't see another option. I have even contemplated getting a guard dog...Janus?

I'll suggest a guard dog and maybe a shotgun for when you are there by yourself.

Sorry this happened to you sweetie. Nobody deserves this.

And By the Way....I have my passport sitting right here......I'd be glad to move in...Strictly for security purposes. 

[DemonDelight]

I'm sorry to hear that you have experienced the same missb. I really couldn't give a shit about what was stolen.

I can't imagine living there again. I'm questioning whether running is the right response, but I can't see another option. I have even contemplated getting a guard dog...Janus?

I'll suggest a guard dog and maybe a shotgun for when you are there by yourself.

Sorry this happened to you sweetie. Nobody deserves this.

And By the Way....I have my passport sitting right here......I'd be glad to move in...Strictly for security purposes.  

Uh-huh, Sure Janus. Very convincing…. I can picture it now. She's having some private fun time in her room late one night and you come bursting in with the whole knight-in-shining-armor routine claiming you thought she was in danger then offer to finish the job you just interrupted…

[Cats Whiskers]

I'm sorry to hear that you have experienced the same missb. I really couldn't give a shit about what was stolen.

I can't imagine living there again. I'm questioning whether running is the right response, but I can't see another option. I have even contemplated getting a guard dog...Janus?

I'll suggest a guard dog and maybe a shotgun for when you are there by yourself.

Sorry this happened to you sweetie. Nobody deserves this.

And By the Way....I have my passport sitting right here......I'd be glad to move in...Strictly for security purposes. 

Uh-huh, Sure Janus. Very convincing…. I can picture it now. She's having some private fun time in her room late one night and you come bursting in with the whole knight-in-shining-armor routine claiming you thought she was in danger then offer to finish the job you just interrupted…

LOL!

I'm sure that thought never crossed Janus' mind DD... Crossed mine though!

[phtlc]

Just after high school I was working 2.5 minimum wage jobs (no fucking idea how I did that) which had me working ridiculous hours and literally catching naps between each and living with room mates. One day I woke up to go to the bathroom and noticed it was rather breezy. Someone had broken in while I was asleep. They took one VCR but not the other. After the fact I recalled in retrospect hearing a noise downstairs as I went downstairs. The cops surmised that I had probably woken up during the middle of it and the burglars, having assumed nobody was home freaked out when they heard me coming down the stairs and ran without the second VCR.


It drove me FUCKING INSANE to think that had I been a little more alert I could have snuck up on the vermin cockroach filth and sodomized them with a size ten boot, but I learned to put "could have" and what "might have been" behind me and move on.


For about 2 years after that I almost went vigilante, following and observing anyone suspicious looking filth who was casing my neighborhood. The area I lived in had a fuck load of petty crime (B&E and car break ins), but I eventually reasoned that it wasn't healthy to live in a vigilant state of paranoia. I was so bothered by the incident that at the time (being much younger and less wiser) I might have gone overboard and taught one of these punks a lesson and found myself in trouble with the law (despite the fact that they deserved it).


I'm sorry this happened to you and I hope you move on. It is healthier to put it behind you asap. If you feel nervous get a big dog. A German shepherd will very capable of convincing one of these filth who shouldn't be breeding that breaking into your home will not be in his best interest.


A good thing to consider is what they call crime prevention through environmental design (CPTED). Do you have shrubs right near windows? Is there poor lighting in your back yard? Some police departments have citizen volunteers that will assist you in better protecting your home pro-actively.

[phtlc]

I'll suggest a guard dog and maybe a shotgun for when you are there by yourself.

Bingo! I could never imagine using a handgun for home defense if I had a shotgun.

As for the dog, it's not just the physical protection, but the sense of companionship that can help offset any unnecessary paranoia.

[Lippy]

I'll suggest a guard dog and maybe a shotgun for when you are there by yourself.

Bingo! I could never imagine using a handgun for home defense if I had a shotgun.

As for the dog, it's not just the physical protection, but the sense of companionship that can help offset any unnecessary paranoia.

I live in England,  a handgun is certainly not an option. I would love to get a dog, however I work long hours and also work away on occasion,  so a dog isn't a viable option unfortunately.  Thank you for your perspective 

[phtlc]

I live in England,  a handgun is certainly not an option. I would love to get a dog, however I work long hours and also work away on occasion,  so a dog isn't a viable option unfortunately.  Thank you for your perspective 

Can you get a Remington 870 in England?

[Cats Whiskers]

Can you get a Remington 870 in England?

Only with a valid licence from the police.

[DemonDelight]

I'll suggest a guard dog and maybe a shotgun for when you are there by yourself.

Bingo! I could never imagine using a handgun for home defense if I had a shotgun.

As for the dog, it's not just the physical protection, but the sense of companionship that can help offset any unnecessary paranoia.

I live in England,  a handgun is certainly not an option. I would love to get a dog, however I work long hours and also work away on occasion,  so a dog isn't a viable option unfortunately.  Thank you for your perspective 

Yea, bringing Janus into your home could pose as a problem. He is a bit high maintenanced. He needs to be fed, walked, and stroked daily lol

[Lippy]

Does horizontal jogging count?

[phtlc]

Can you get a Remington 870 in England?

Only with a valid licence from the police.

Then get the licence. Shotguns are amazing, Even a 44 magnum doesn't even come close to a 12 gauge for stopping power, so don't waste time with the glock.

1: Contrary to popular misconception you do actually have to aim a shotgun and in fact can miss if you don't. Too many people think of the shotgun shell as having claymore mine properties.

2: While this theory may be a bone of contention amongst many gun owners (some strongly believe, some strongly dismiss), I tend to agree with those who believe that the mere sound of a pump action shotgun being racked will discourage many (not all) predators. You need to have the resolve to follow through if they aren't deterred, but my opinion is that most filth will get the fuck out of dodge when they hear that sound.