Was nice, don't get me wrong, but they were too young, and I was too high. Should never have done anything with them, but I was being an idiot at that point in my life.
Never have I ever had someone fart while i was going down on them.
there is rarely an opportunity to tell this story (i can't claim it as my own, thank god), so here we go..
my friend L had a thing about her boyfriend going down on her. she was just kind of weird about it. all other sex stuff she was fine with, but i guess she was uncomfortable with head so she rarely let him eat her out. one night, boyfriend is at work and L is at home, halfway through her second bottle of red wine and watching sexy romantic comedies by herself. her boyfriend came home right at that sweet spot of being wine drunk, when you're in a bubbly mood and you just feel great. this is her story...
"J comes in and i'm just feeling, sexy as hell! i think i'm being cute and sexy and spontaneous and he's just trying to go along with it for my sake. i'm throwing myself down on our bed, trying to be seductive when i'm pretty sure i was just flailing around like an idiot, but he loves me so he's going along with my antics, and i decide i want him to give me head. i practically force him to start eating me out, he was being really reluctant about it, i guess because i was acting like a fool, but i begged him in my sexy voice to do it, saying that if he didn't eat me out now i would never let him touch me again, yadda yadda yadda. so J is just getting into it down there when.. well... i fart. and A, it wasn't a short small fart. i farted for like, a full 10 seconds. do you know how long 10 seconds is when you have your face in a fart? god i was so humiliated, but still drunk. J just rolled over, got under the covers and pretended to go to sleep. he hasn't said a single word about it and i don't know if i should bring it up or just pray he will never think about it again."
i laughed hysterically for about 10 minutes after this. anyway, it was like 3 years ago now that it happened and they're engaged, so i guess he got over it.