I had a sex dream last night, that was so wildly inappropriate, I can’t even put it in writing. And it was with a person I have zero interest in, that I find disturbing, and unattractive. But she climbing in bed with me naked, stuck her tongue in my mouth, and who was I to say no? Wifely got the benefit of my raging morning wood. I was thinking about my strange dream, when the garden hose unkinked.