I think it's time that I tell my wife that I have been writing erotica online for the last couple of years. Since she's Ace and doesn't really have sexual fantasies of her own, she's fascinated when I tell her about mine after we had sex, or just when we are cuddling. On that occasion, this was the very fantasy that spawned my "Golf On Monday" story, which has some measure of real-life stuff in it --- I actually grew up in that small town north of Montréal and I actually worked at that Golf Club as a caddie from 10 to 17 years old, and there was free golf for us on Monday... But no, there was never a chat with a cute lady living just "out-of-bounds" off the twelfth hole.
The story where a teenage boy fucks a grown woman, from ages anywhere between 20 and 50+, is a big fantasy of mine since as long as I can remember. My relationship with my wife has improved quite a bit now that I'm beginning to truly accept that she's Ace. She deeply loves me and she is a very caring wife; she loves me on her own terms!
She knew that my "teen boy" fantasy was an intense one because I gave her a huge creamy load! Yes, the picture I had in my mind of a beautiful lady in checkered dress that soon comes off her really had me hit it off! That young lady in the story also has similar looks to my wife. Like I said, it's time for me to confess to her that I've been writing sex fantasy stories for a while...
Since she has a host of health issues, she doesn't want children and I'm OK with that. I'm myself on the Autistic spectrum and I don't think I'd be that great a dad anyway. We have several pet birds who are very happy to have us.
I do not think there will be much trouble from your wife, as long as you kindly and calmly explain that it is just an outlet. I think you would be a great father, as my dad told me, after bloodying my nose when he bailed me out of jail the second time, for getting drunk and fornicating with the statue of the school mascot with my idiot friends. I cried at him about how I was not ready to be a father, and he told me that no man is ready to be a father, and if they say they are, they are lying. Fatherhood isn't, in my opinion, something you can prepare for. I raised 3 girls and one boy, and every single day, my limits are tested.
My oldest daughter was born in the roughest time of my life. The ink on our HS diplomas were not dry, and here I am married, and living in a cigar box of an apartment, whom the old Russian woman rented to us out of pity. I had to work many, many odd jobs to not only support my family during this time, but to start to put myself through school. I knew nothing of diapers, creams, formulas, or toys. Most of the stuff I learned was trial and error, and if it worked and did not harm her in any way, then i did a good job. But there were some nights, only a few, as she was not a fussy baby, where I had to walk the floor with her, times we would be already out the door for church or family functions, where I had to do a clothes change, as she would either have spit up on my shirt, or heaven forbid, pissed or some poop leaked from her diaper. But now looking back, she is now in college, met a somewhat decent man, whom I seen a bit of the old me in, and is working towards a life of her own.
My second oldest daughter was the baby princess/diva. She required round the clock attention, due to having have a burp tube installed. And she was incredibly fussy. When she was born, my first daughter was around one, and taking care of her meant I had to divide my attention between a very curious one year old, and a newborn. We had just moved to a bigger place, because I found a job close to campus and home, so it was a tad easier. But I still did not have the dad knack down, despite all the experience from the first. She is now a sophomore in college doing okay, hits me up for money more than I would like, but she pays me back when she can, so its cool.
My third daughter, was hell on two legs. She hit the ground running, and took no shit from anyone. From the time she could move, she had to be watched. But by this time, from a loan from my parents, and my in laws, we could afford our first house. I started working where I do now at this time, and it did not get any easier. Constant sibling meltdowns, long hours, and my wife at this time was finishing getting her nursing degree. If we did not have all the help of close friends, babysitters, family, and even relatives, I do not think we could have survived long.
My son, was born, when his sisters were in elementary school, going into middle. He was what I liked to call, a lump. You could sit him on the floor, and he would watch everything, not a terribly active baby, unless it was a toy he liked. My daughters learned alot of mommy things, helping my wife with him, and their help was essential.
Now my youngest daughter has entered the hs girl phase of being a mature woman, I kind of cried when she boxed up her old toys in her room, to donate to charity. She earned the money to repaint her room, and now its ugly as all sin. But she wanted it, and earned it. Still not sure where I messed up the steps with her, as her sisters were girlie girls, but I find no fault in her way of life, as I was not much of a mans man coming up. more power to her.
My youngest son has returned to lump status. He either is thinking with his dick, or trying to off himself in a way that will obviously make me look bad. His new aspiration is to join the Nitro Circus. I told him he could do whatever he wanted if he could raise thirty thousand dollars. He asked why? I said for his funeral and medical costs. He got mad. I did not care.
I do not believe there is a thing of a good or bad father, I think its more of the balance of mistakes and successes that are added at the end when you watch them walk away into a life of their own. I also have another confession. I.DO.NOT.WANT.ANOTHER.KID. nope I did my time in Hormone Hell. Not interested. In fact while I am thinking about it, and since I learned PH is a lawyer, is it possible to have a contract drawn I could have my wife's friend sign that excludes me from any financial support for the child, but in the case of something happening to them to where they absolutely can no longer care for the child, for me and my wife to adopt it? I ask this, despite not wanting to raise anymore, but in the fairness of the fact that I helped make it, and all.