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Offline Pornhubby

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Reply #5200 on: November 28, 2024, 07:56:54 PM

”You can be mad as a mad dog at the way things went.  You can swear and curse the fates.  But when it comes to the end, you have to let go.” — The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

Offline Pornhubby

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Reply #5201 on: November 30, 2024, 08:15:24 PM
A group of cows were playing poker and sharing a joint. That’s right. The steaks were pretty high.

”You can be mad as a mad dog at the way things went.  You can swear and curse the fates.  But when it comes to the end, you have to let go.” — The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

Offline purpleshoes

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Reply #5202 on: December 01, 2024, 12:51:57 PM
A group of cows were playing poker and sharing a joint. That’s right. The steaks were pretty high.

Quote from: Pornhubby on November 28, 2024, 07:56:54 PM



Good one.


Offline Sandra

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Reply #5203 on: December 03, 2024, 12:10:26 PM
Wife: Do men wipe after they pee?
Husband: Yes. Wipe the floor, wipe the rim, wipe the wall.....

________________

Why Men Are Like Computers:

10. They have a lot of data but are still clueless.
9. A better model is always just around the corner.
8. They look nice and shiny until you bring them home.
7. It is always necessary to have a backup.
6. They'll do whatever you say if you push the right buttons.
5. The best part of having either one is the games you can play.
4. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on.
3. The lights are on but nobody's home.
2. Big power surges knock them out for the night.
1. Size does matter.

 :emot_laughing:



Our aim is to provide a FREE friendly place where male and female members can post their thoughts or pornographic images on any subject or reply to a topic and promote masturbation.

Offline Dudester

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Reply #5204 on: December 03, 2024, 06:31:37 PM
What’s the difference between a feminist and a gun?
A gun only has one trigger.

Why do sumo wrestlers shave their legs?
To avoid being mistaken for feminists.

A little girl says to her mother, “Mommy, I want to be a feminist when I grow up.”
Her Mom says, “Well pick one Sweetie, you can’t do both.”

Teach a man to fish and he will eat for a lifetime.
Teach a feminist to fish and she will accuse you of patronizing her, claim she knew how to do it anyway and that even if she didn’t, she could easily work it out without the help of a man.


Offline MissBarbara

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Reply #5205 on: December 03, 2024, 06:52:37 PM
Quote from: Dudester on December 03, 2024, 06:31:37 PM

What’s the difference between a feminist and a gun?
A gun only has one trigger.



Really? Then how do you explain this:








"Sometimes the best things in life are a hot girl and a cold beer."


Offline purpleshoes

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Reply #5206 on: December 04, 2024, 12:15:16 PM


Funniest tee shirt I saw today.

I'M VEGAN
FROM MY HEAD
TOMATOES

 :roll:



Offline MintJulie

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Reply #5207 on: December 05, 2024, 05:56:11 AM
Quote from: purpleshoes on December 04, 2024, 12:15:16 PM


Funniest tee shirt I saw today.

I'M VEGAN
FROM MY HEAD
TOMATOES

 :roll:

 :roll:

Vegan puns are so corny 

.
          You might not know this, but I have a thing for Tom Brady (and Bill Clinton)

Offline purpleshoes

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Reply #5208 on: December 05, 2024, 12:03:40 PM


I see what you did there.  ;D Woo 1810.



Offline ObiDongKenobi

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Reply #5209 on: December 05, 2024, 05:13:08 PM

Princess, would you like to see it light up and hum when I wave it about

Offline purpleshoes

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Reply #5210 on: December 06, 2024, 12:02:58 PM

Woo 1767!

That's hilarious, even though the best known Wernher von Braun died almost 50 years ago.



Offline Pornhubby

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Reply #5211 on: December 06, 2024, 10:24:53 PM
Quote from: purpleshoes on December 06, 2024, 12:02:58 PM

Woo 1767!

That's hilarious, even though the best known Wernher von Braun died almost 50 years ago.



We’d all be speaking Russian (or German), if Trump had been President.

”You can be mad as a mad dog at the way things went.  You can swear and curse the fates.  But when it comes to the end, you have to let go.” — The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

Offline staci

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Reply #5212 on: December 10, 2024, 09:09:14 PM
A blonde walked in to the department store, pointed and told a salesman, I want that TV.
"Nope, he said, "We don't sell to blondes." 
She left, went back in with Red hair, Again, pointed and said, "I want that TV" "No, she was told , we do not sell to blondes"

A third time she entered, now dressed with a hat and a fake nose, "I want that TV". "No, we still do not sell to blondes."
Frustrated, she asked the salesman, "how can you tell I am a blonde?"
He said, "because, that is a microwave".

one of the originals

Offline Shiela_M

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  • I said it's weird, not that I wouldn't do it.
Reply #5213 on: December 11, 2024, 05:01:32 AM
Of men are always, "thinking with the wrong head", does that mean, I might be using the wrong lips???


Offline Pornhubby

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Reply #5214 on: December 11, 2024, 09:23:51 AM
San Diego is what happens when you drop a waffle at the beach.

”You can be mad as a mad dog at the way things went.  You can swear and curse the fates.  But when it comes to the end, you have to let go.” — The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

Offline Shiela_M

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  • I said it's weird, not that I wouldn't do it.
Reply #5215 on: December 11, 2024, 04:30:16 PM
Apparently there was a lonely, single man who was on facebook looking for a wife. Within a couple hours, he had over 500 responses from men saying he could have theirs.


Offline staci

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Reply #5216 on: December 24, 2024, 06:22:38 PM
a guy stops at a farm and asks the farmer, I noticed you have a lot of milkweed, may I have permission to get some milk? Farmer laughed and said, man, you can't get milk from milkweed. I'll have you know, I am a graduate of Texas AM and have a degree in Agricultural Science said the man. Farmer shrugged and said, knock yourself out Mister.
Later, he sees the city slicker leaving with two one gallon jugs of milk.

Next day he shows up again, stating he came across a patch of honey suckle and asked permission to get some honey. Again the farmer agreed after saying there is no way to get honey from honey suckle and hearing about the school and degree.
Soon the guy returned with two pails of honey and left.

Next day he shows again and states he saw a bunch of pussy willows by the pond. Farmer shouted. Stop right there, let me get my boots on, I am going with you.

one of the originals

Offline Writers Bloque

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Reply #5217 on: December 24, 2024, 06:37:02 PM
Quote from: staci on December 24, 2024, 06:22:38 PM
a guy stops at a farm and asks the farmer, I noticed you have a lot of milkweed, may I have permission to get some milk? Farmer laughed and said, man, you can't get milk from milkweed. I'll have you know, I am a graduate of Texas AM and have a degree in Agricultural Science said the man. Farmer shrugged and said, knock yourself out Mister.
Later, he sees the city slicker leaving with two one gallon jugs of milk.

Next day he shows up again, stating he came across a patch of honey suckle and asked permission to get some honey. Again the farmer agreed after saying there is no way to get honey from honey suckle and hearing about the school and degree.
Soon the guy returned with two pails of honey and left.

Next day he shows again and states he saw a bunch of pussy willows by the pond. Farmer shouted. Stop right there, let me get my boots on, I am going with you.

Love it!

View a list of all my stories here

To taste Heaven, one must play in Hell.

Offline Pornhubby

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Reply #5218 on: January 03, 2025, 12:43:19 AM
My predictions for 2025:  Expect rain in some places, drought in others, unexpected events, a famous person's death, and activity in the stock market.

”You can be mad as a mad dog at the way things went.  You can swear and curse the fates.  But when it comes to the end, you have to let go.” — The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

Offline purpleshoes

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Reply #5219 on: January 03, 2025, 12:02:38 PM


Don't forget snow in Minnesota and Wisconsin. Gotta justify having those heated seats.  ;D



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